The Cloud of Me and Mine
June, 2025
I wake in the morning,
and for a moment,
there is space –
vast, rested, still.
And then – sometimes slowly,
sometimes all at once –
it comes.
A current of consciousness
rushing in,
ready to take over.
Or maybe not.
Maybe it’s just arriving –
and I have a choice:
to grasp it,
or let it pass.
The cloud of me and mine asks:
What am I going to do now?
What’s next?
Who will I talk to?
What messages?
What emails?
It swirls – relentless.
A tightness forms.
A tension.
A hurry.
An urgency that loops and loops –
grasping, digesting, analyzing,
stretching toward answers,
spinning of thoughts.
Busy, busy, busy.
This is the cloud of me and mine.
But I remember:
I have a choice.
When I wake,
there is also just this –
vastness.
No name.
No purpose.
No direction,
no past,
no future.
Just this.
This is who I am,
before I have a name.
I can rest, be, and do
as this ungrasping this.
It is a practice.
A focus.
A returning.
Home.
Charlotte Jigen Juul
I am a Zen priest with a MA in Contemplative Psychotherapy and Buddhist Psychology from Naropa University, Boulder, Colorado, USA and a BA in Psychosynthesis from “The Psychosynthesis and Education Trust” in London. Besides that, I am a certified SE-Practitioner (SEP), in Trauma Psychology, Somatic Experience (SE-practitioner, Peter Levine), I am a certified BigMind Facilitator by Zen Master Genpo Roshi and became an “Ordained Zen priest” in 2018.
Recent Posts
An Invitation into the Silence
The Three Faces of Intimacy
Gratitude as an Antidote to Negative Emotions
The Cloud of Me and Mine
Zen without Dogma